Tuesday 27 May 2014

UL: Volume 1 Chapter 5


This chapter was brought to you by AnmesicCat, Masadeer, and Yeenie.



Burn! Classroom!


Atlantis — Time: ~3.00 PM (Provided by XueZhang)

"I'm not in the mood to joke with you."

Just when I was about to smile casually and ask if senior was joking, in less than a second, senior had already spoken, and thus cutting off my fire of hope.

Oh God... In my entire life, I've never done any bad things to anyone. The only person whom I need to apologize to the most would be my mother (that's because she had to often go to the hospital and pay for my medical expenses). So why did you have to make a fool out of me this way?!

The classroom senior pointed to was particularly vicious in its jumping. Estimated speed should be at least a hundred and twenty. The one issuing the loudest sound in the open space was the same classroom.

"Ah ha ha..." I'll accept my fate.

Anyway dying earlier or later won't make much of a difference. Being run over by a train or being crushed by a cement room, I would still die in the end...

Dragging my illogical footsteps, I headed straight for the open space but the senior on my side suddenly grabbed my hand, "Are you trying to take a step to ascend to heaven?!" His red eyes, as sharp as knives, were glaring at me.

"Aiya, since I'm already destined to ascend to heaven, one or two steps won't make much of a difference." I wasn't sure of the reason but I suddenly had the urge to start joking!

Senior looked at me again, but this time it was obvious he was enduring his urge to kick me, "This empty space is actually Equinoctial Water. If you walk there, you'll directly go to hell. You won't even need to ascend to heaven any more."

What, Equinoctial Water? I can't even see one drop of water in the open space.

As if he saw through my doubts, XueZhang took out a piece of paper from his pocket, "Shadows appear and soar in the sky."

Then I saw the piece of paper, which suddenly started floating in the air and in an instant. The paper folded itself twice, becoming a pair of paper wings and flew towards the open space.

"So your level is still not good enough to see Equinoctial Water." Smiling coldly, senior made it obvious he was waiting to see a good show.

As I was about to open my mouth to ask what he meant, the paper wings flapped and flapped, finally reaching the open space. Then it slowly descended onto the ground.

In a split moment, within the empty open space, there was a split second when the space was suddenly distorted. At the same time, the paper wings descended onto the ground, I saw a shark-like mouth issuing a "roar!" and then swallowed the paper wings.

...

What happened at that moment was clear with the sound in provided... The wings had disappeared.

However if I think about it clearly, if it was me who stepped on the open space, blood would have been sprayed all over the ground; according to the Nation Geographic Channel's prediction.

"If you want to chase the classroom, you'll need to use this." A surfboard suddenly appeared in senior's hands.

"...Oh, okay, I'll go and buy one right away." I totally won't be surprised any more, not even a little. I'm very calm now; I won't be surprised by anything anymore.

Even if senior suddenly got the classrooms to halt, sit down and shake, I won't be scared.

...

...

Damn it, what kind of freaking school is this?!

"Buy one your head!" Senior glared at me again, and threw the white surfboard into the empty space. The miraculous board was actually floating thirty centimeters away from the ground, just as if there really were waves below it.

I felt like I could hear the sound of the ocean waves. Sunset, beach, coconut trees, such a perfect scenery. I wonder if Guinness World Records allows an application for "1 second of madness".

* * *


"Look carefully, I'll only demonstrate this once. This is how you're supposed to use it."

After one of his foot stepped on the surfboard, senior bent down, flipped open a compartment where the leash was kept. Senior then tightly grabbed onto the leash, with its length extending nicely up to his waist, "Just like this and you can start using it."

I stood at the same spot, watching senior's extremely neat actions and began suspecting if he uses the floating surfboard to chase after classrooms everyday...

"If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have wanted to use this extremely ugly antique!" Senior roared at me.

Alright, I was wrong, he wouldn't use it daily. But senior was senior. Even while standing on the surfboard, he exuded a certain level of coolness.

"Still not coming up?" Red eyes glared at me again, as if I'm still not up there in within the next second, he would most probably help me to implement a hairstyle as smooth as a high-speed highway by shaving it with the surfboard.

"Coming, I'm coming"

I'm really afraid of that unidentified shark mouth. The second I jumped onto the surfboard, I definitely felt the surfboard dipping downwards by a little and then it once again floated upwards with the wave.

The surfboard was very stable in senior's hands. Totally different from the time when I went to the beach last year, where I capsized and directly sunk to the bottom of the seabed.

"Let me tell you this first, just in case you're still unaware of the situation. In this school, everything with life has a name that binds them. Just like this board we're riding on, it also has a name. When you need it, just call him, but after you're done using it, you need to thank it, which is the basic etiquette." Senior said calmly, and it seemed like he wasn't joking.

"Ah?" So troublesome.

Senior looked at me and without changing his expression, "Don't complain about it being troublesome. If it was you, if you were used and weren't thank afterwards, you won't be happy about it either!"

It made sense. But the problem was, "Senior..." I strongly suspected he knew what I was thinking. From morning till now, I felt like I had been stripped and was seen thoroughly by him.

"I have no interest in prying into your boring thoughts." Snorting the air out from his nose, senior turned his head away.

You obviously heard it! This school doesn't give the students their privacy!

"If you want the thing called privacy, then you'll need to work hard to improve yourself. Now be a good boy and listen carefully!" One punch on top of my head, and without giving me any time to wail, senior continued his lecture about the surfboard, "This guy's name is Silin. Before using it, you'll need to say, "Please give me the speed of a Benz on this water, Silin".

At that very moment, I felt the board at my feet starting to float a little, as if it was being propped upwards.

"Let's rumble." With just those those two simple words, after senior finished saying them, the surfboard suddenly acted like a crazy wild dog hit by a stone. Using less than half a second, it rushed away.

"Waaaaaaaahhhh—!!" I started suspecting that today's school registration training is actually a screaming ceremony.

Damn it damn it, what the hell is this surfboard! Its speed was at least hundred and eighty. Ahhhhhhhh!

A sweet fruity aroma drifted over with the wind and into my sense of smell, but the current me, who almost had my face deformed due to the wind pressure, totally had no time to determine where the smell came from.

"Yaaaaaah—!!" Saliva was blown by the wind till it sprayed out, dripping onto the surfboard below.

"Damn noisy!" With the wind pressure came a fierce sound, I didn't even take one second to stuff my hand into my mouth and firmly bite on it.

After one day of being together I deeply believed senior was a lot scarier. I cannot go against him.

"Silin, catch up to it." Senior, who was pulling the leash to manipulate the direction, was still impressively standing upright. Even while I was squatting on the board, hugging onto his thigh or hanging onto his body, these actions were completely ignored.

I don't want to play any more, I don't want to play any more! Is there anyone who can take me home?! Ma, quickly help me drop out of school!

Just as my tears were about to appear and mix together with my snot, my collar suddenly tightened and my entire body was then pulled up.

"Look carefully, that room is your classroom." The senior in front of me said, unsure of when he had already chased up to the huge cement block. His silver hair seemed to be like dried rice noodle as it kept falling on my face causing it to itch.

From inside a pile of hair, I saw an almost similar cement block thunderously jumping right in front and began to doubt my identifying skill, as I can't even differentiate one classroom from another.

"Even if you are an idiot, each classroom has a doorplate above. Unless you are blind, then you won't be able to see it." Senior's cold speech, which seems to be able to cut through one's heart floated over.

This time I clearly saw them. On top of the jumping classrooms... were big hanging door-plates, swaying here and there as the classrooms jumped.

The top of the classroom reads: First Grade, C Department.

"This school's class placement for each students are according to their abilities."

Oh oh, so that means my ability wasn't so bad. The alphabet was one of the first few.

"There are only three classes in each year." Senior added this after a while.

"..."

* * *


"Whoa!"

"F***!"

Just when the two of us were getting closer to the classroom's door, the detestable huge cement block suddenly did an emergency brake, fixed itself at one position, stood firmly, and then immediately turned around and ran at the opposite direction.

"Damn you!" Senior wasn't planning to back down either, braking and standing firm in less than one breathing cycle, he then tightened the leash in his hands causing the surfboard to make a 180 degree turn. It was so quick that I almost became a meteor as I was almost thrown off.

Nevertheless, I still remembered I wasn't a meteor, a meteor would at least punch a big hole on the ground. But if I was the one who flew down, I'll most probably be the one to have a hole punched on my body by the shark's mouth. Since I appreciate my life, I clung on to senior and wouldn't let go.

Mama, I met a surfboard racing gang.

"Bastard, you'd better watch out!" Senior was clamoring at the classroom in front. It was obvious he was already intoxicated with the thrill of racing. In fact, I felt that motorcycle racing was nothing, really.

Once you've seen a person standing on a surfboard racing with a room, I believe you would think so too.

"Se-se-se-se-senior..." I said with trembling voice.

I wasn't sure if it was due to "this looks fun", but several unrelated classrooms that were nearby, suddenly crowded around. With booming sounds, they collided with each other in front of us and then bounced off. The collision raised a huge amount of dust in front of us where small broken pieces of cement were also present inside the dust.

"Shut up, hold on tight!" Senior, who was obviously a veteran in a battlefield, did not even bat an eyelid; the leash on his hands were turning left and right. The nimble surfboard was non-stop traversing like a snake while in the midst of a bunch of cement blocks colliding with one another, "Want to win against me with this kind of level, you'd better go back and practice more."

I wasn't sure who he was talking to, but my hunch was telling me he seemed to be... arguing... with the cement blocks.

The cement blocks that were left behind started a commotion by colliding into one big mess issuing an even louder sound. Then we continued to chase after my classroom again.

After settling the surfboard's speed, senior turned around and said to me, "Hey, listen carefully, every one of the classrooms here each have their own names. Only when you call out the right name, they will then stop and allow you to enter."

Good boy, please do not do this because turning your head while you are driving is a dangerous behavior.

"I, I, I, I, I understand..." Trembling voice.

Sighing, senior then began to speak: "Remember well, the name of this classroom is: Clothe in Moral, a wedge close to eminent, extending from west to west, a promise of C Ancient Block."

A long string of words that I heard but did not understand.

"What?" What did you say? I totally didn't get it at all. Was it even human language? What's with the long string of words?

"Clothe in Moral, a wedge close to eminent, extending from west to west, a promise of C Ancient Block." Senior repeated it once again but it was clearly written on the expression on his face that if I were to ask him to say it a third time, he will throw me off the surfboard.

I didn't have the courage to call out the name of the classroom. But firstly I want to clarify one thing, "Excuse me, what would happen if I call the wrong name?"

"Nothing." Senior's answer was not what I'd expected.

Just when the two of us were at a stalemate, far away at the other side, another surfboard appeared and on top of it was a guy, who was wearing the school uniform, chasing after a classroom. Then he was shouting something out loud.

So the action of chasing after the classroom with a surfboard wasn't limited just to us. For some unknown reason, I suddenly felt a lot more balanced.

"That fool called the wrong name." Senior while still handling the surfboard, turned his head back. I followed his gaze and looked across.

The classroom the person was chasing suddenly stood still. I only used half a second to see a "#" mark appearing on top of the cement block. The cement block then immediately turned around (I think that's what happened), and suddenly started sprinting across as it crazily chased after the student.

It was a horrible scene. My breathing and heartbeat stopped (Or so it felt).

Ju-just now, Se-senior, what did he say? What did he say?!

"There are always idiots who often called the classroom's name wrongly." At one side this sentence was thrown at me.

That cement block was like a crazed hungry dog that saw some meat on a bone and started to urgently chase after the student, causing the whole empty space to rumble with loud noises.

Then it become slow motioned. The cement block jumped up, fell down.

"Bam! Boom!" crashing down on top of the student.

"Oh right, if the name is called wrongly, the classroom will become mad." XueZhang said while pointing at the cement block which still had a "#" on it. The cement block was still twisting left and right, venting its anger, "Most of them will react this way."

Speechless. I really do not know what else to say. I had an amazing feeling... where I felt that my silent sorrow overwhelming my dishearten self. I suddenly knew where those crushed bodies in front of the Health Care Center came from.

* * *


I want to go home. I did not know how many times my past life had quickly flashed in front of my eyes. It seemed like I can even see my grandma, who had passed away last year, waving her hands on top of a cloud.

"Senior." I resigned to my fate as I bit the bullet and called out to him, "I'm sorry I totally cannot remember." Instead of being crushed to death by the cement classroom and then having a fate of a cockroach where I was then grind by a twisting cement block, I'd rather be kicked to death by senior, at least the sole of his his shoe looks a little friendlier and more petite in comparison.

"I know, because you are stupid."

Such an extremely unhesitating speech, makes me feel really sad.

"I'll demonstrate it once, for you to see. You'd better not be the one who's crushed to death. It will be a disgrace to me, as your guide." Adding two more sentences, senior pulled the leash causing the whole surfboard to glide to the right, and was then following right next to the door, "Clothe in Moral, a wedge close to eminent, extending from west to west, a promise of C Ancient Block, if you're still not going to stop, I'll tear you apart!"

I was pretty sure the teeth grinding, last part of that ruthless sentence, was not the classroom's name.

Just as senior issued his final warning, the classroom suddenly shook twice, then looking like a ghost having cramps, the classroom shivered and slowly stopped moving.

"That's it."

The classroom's door suddenly opened. Before I even had the chance to think about the problem of whether the Equinoctial Water will flow inside, senior, who was in front of me, had already moved behind me and kicked me into the classroom. He followed by jumping in.

"Ah, right." I quickly turned around as I still remembered senior's instruction, "Silin, thank you." If this was the normal world, people would think I was crazy because I was saying my gratitude to a surfboard.

"Alright, quickly get into your seat." Senior tugged at my collar and headed inside. Then the classroom's door slowly, closed. The same moment the door closed, I seemed to have heard a sound.

"You're welcome. Please do come visit us again next time." The hoarse voice of an old man and the tender voice of a young child combined together making it sound really strange.

...

...

I've decided... It'd be better to pretend those voices were illusions.

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